hair growing? really?

Well, it is more of a fuzz, like peaches, but I do have some new hair on my head and it is dark colored. What ever fuzz I had left was very light colored. I am not sure if it will really grow to make my head hairy again. There is also some hair showing up on my legs and arms - I wish all this effort would go to my eyebrows and eyelashes. By the way I have become quite competent in painting some eyebrows and putting in an eyeliner with a brush - quite an accomplishment for someone who rarely put on any make up :). I should take some pictures and post them.. maybe this weekend.

My sister and my two nieces left today, it was so nice to have them here. Deniz and Ada had playmates at all times (although we had to protect my baby niece from Ada many a times, since she could was a little too rough with her sometimes). And having a sister by your side is priceless. Well, now my two sisters will get to spend some time together and I hope they have a great time. But tonight the house was VERY quiet :).

Deniz started 1st grade today. I did not cry like I did last year when she walked into the classroom the first day of Kindergarten. It is a good thing, she needs the challenge and stimulation and I am sure she will do fine.

Ada will start pre-K tomorrow. I have been keeping her home with the hopes of minimizing the risk of diseases but I also do not want to hold her out too much, because I know the first days of school are important to find your friends and make new ones.

OK, I better go to sleep. This cycle seems to be better than last one. I was really out on Saturday and Sunday, basically spent most of both days in bed. And Monday I was miserable, but Tuesday I didn't have to take any anti-nausea medication and today I took only one. My energy levels are better, too. I could finally ride the stationary bike. Yaaay!

Good night everyone!

1 more to go

So this morning I went in for the second half of 5-FU. I was really not feeling well. The nausea has been much worse this cycle. I take the medication to keep it under control. But today just before getting the chemo I almost cried to my nice nurse. I think I am just tired. I remember when I was first diagnosed I kept saying that I was tough and that I could take the physical abuse due to chemo. And I do take it but it is getting harder and harder. With time the chemicals accumulate in my body even more so each cycle is a little harder. Buuuut I have only one cycle left.

Today was the first day of classes. And now we are a university. Our name changed from Mesa State College to Colorado Mesa University. The students were back, our campus that was quite quiet over the summer became alive again. In the morning I wasn't sure if I could teach my two classes, but I did. As a matter of fact it felt good to be in class again. I put hand sanitizer probably 20 times today. And thankfully tomorrow will be not too hard also. In the morning I go in for the Neulasta shot and then I will have the same classes as I did today, so no need for new prep. Yaaay for my department for getting me a relatively easy teaching load this semester. Do not get me wrong, I am teaching 12 credit hours and I will have almost 250 students this semester - isn't that crazy? But at least I have taught these classes before so it is much easier.

OK I better wrap up and go to sleep, I took my pill that will help with the nausea and make me sleepy :)

Cheers everybody!

3rd cycle FEC update

Since I knew my blood values were acceptable as of last week i wasn't too anxious about that. Access to the port was great except they had trouble withdrawing blood, but they got as much as they needed. This time I saw a different doctor and she was very nice. Very patient with all my questions and suggested I take another drug to help with my nausea, It is a proton pump inhibitor so that my stomach doesn't excrete as much acid and destroy the lining of my stomach since it is already under attack from the chemo. She said I was doing great considering what a harsh regimen I am receiving and that really made feel good. It is great when your doctor or nurse says that you are doing well. I actually felt pretty good going in. But with the ativan in my system I became pretty loopy again (I had the very same guy-nurse as I did the first round of Taxol) but this time I did not try to walk on a straight line for him (at least I don't have a recollection of that :) )
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Last week I bumped on my left big toe nail and almost took it off completely. It bleed a lot. It is still attached but looks pretty dead, I keep a band-aid over it to try to keep on as long as possible. The doctor yesterday thought that my finger nails should be OK (because several of them are half way detached) - she thinks that the newly growing nail will keep the whole nail in place until the chemo is done and afterwards things should reverse.

I will go back on Monday morning to get the second half of 5-FU and then Tuesday morning to get Neulasta. By the way have I mentioned how much a single shot of Neulasta costs? over $5000!!! But it is worth it, I was talking to someone and he told me a story of a 30 year old father of 2 sons. He had testicular cancer and was doing OK on his chemo. Then his doctor persuaded him to get just one extra round of chemo and his white blood cells zeroed out, he went septic and died. I really don't appreciate of people telling me how their friends, acquaintances died of cancer but this one was actually a good story to appreciate that I am getting the care that will keep me healthy and out of trouble.

I can see the light at the end of the tunnel finally. I am looking forward to feeling like myself again, except in much better shape than I was before the diagnosis. I am still exercising everyday, watching my diet (i.e. eating mostly plant based foods) and trying to keep a positive outlook on life. I actually did go through boxes and boxes of "junk" that had been accumlating in our sun room and garage and got rid of a lot of stuff, so that was one of my goals for the summer and I consider it 80% done, yaay for me.

School starts on MONDAY! I am looking forward being in class again but I will have to be extra careful not to get sick from my students or my kiddos. lost of handwashing.

Wishing you all a WONDERFUL WEEKEND!

gotta love Neulasta

So, on Monday I went in to have a blood test done. I called several times to get the results but no luck, so finally I went into the cancer center and tried to talk to someone face to face. The nurse said :"your white blood cells are OK but your hemoglobin is low, the triage nurse is talking to the dr to decide if you need a blood transfusion". Needless to say I was very upset, I do not want a blood transfusion if I can help it But she said that my WBC were 2200, so I was quite happy about that.

Finally the oncologists assistant nurse came to talk to me, it turns out the 2200 was the number of total WBC - however the more important value is the actual neutrophil count (ANC) and that was only 500. 1500 is the minimum level to be able to get chemo, at lower values one is very prone to infections. Thankfully the hemoglobin levels were not so low that they would require a blood transfusion. Instead I was told to come back on Thursday to repeat the test.

Well, today everything looked better, hemoglobin levels came back to almost normal, and ANC was 1700, yaaay! Aaaand I still have a week to get chemo so from now on the numbers should improve even more.

Another thing that happened this week is pain in my mouth, mostly on my tongue. Of course the first thought is mouth sores, but I could not see any open wounds, neither could the nurse on Monday, but she talked to the Dr. and they prescribed an antifungal medicine. Later in the day my mouth felt better and I decided to hold till it got worse. Then on Tuesday night I woke up with a lot of pain in mouth, and started the treatment, in the morning it had already improved. And now it is almost gone. I am not sure if it really was a fungal thing or a mouth sore about the start and with the WBC count reaching almost normal levels my body fixed it itself, whatever it is I am happy it feels better because it was making eating a hard task.

After a wonderful week for my eyes (thanks to the steroids and humid weather in GJ), the eyes are dry and itchy again. I even had a day where my vision was somewhat compromised, but not as bad as 3 weeks ago. The warm compresses and the artificial tears are helping, but I think the real solution will be when the chemo ends.

This week I have been going into my office every morning to get some work done. Classes start in 11 days, yikes! I still have so much to do. But I am also getting excited to teach again, I just have to be very careful not to get sick.

I doubt that I will have another post till next Friday when the 3rd cycle will be done.

Love to you all!